shanostics

Some time ago I jokingly created "shanostics" my theory for explaining relationships in the world. Now, it was only partially a joke since I generally believe the basic tenets of shanostics. And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is all original thought, I'm sure somebody somewhere says the same thing, but I didn't read it and then make it my own, so in some ways it is original thought, you just have to consider perspective. That's my disclaimer...This is shanostics. It basically says that all love, to an object or human being is selfish. You love a person because they fill some void, they are of some use to you, just like you love your car because you don't want to walk to the store (even though it may be a block down the road). If that person did not strike a certain chord within you, that person would be basically meaningless to you. Now we can have a basic "love" for humanity in general as well, but even then, a social vision fulfills some broad desire from within an individual to see the world a better place, and one gets enjoyment out of striving for those goals. This is basically my explanation for why people who I have genuinely cared about have come and gone in my life. When I am no longer of use to them, no longer able to fulfil one of their selfish desires, then I am easily expendible. That's just the way it is. Is it wrong? No not necessarily, we are all driven by this selfishness. BUT, the selfishness can be put to good, such as the case is with a person working for charity or a teacher. The selfishness is bad when you hurt someone's feelings, or it becomes a certain level of obsession with an object or whatever. This is one of those things I grapple with everyday because it will not change, but it hurts when you know that you may not always be important to another person because just like the latest fashion, it can get old. This applies to friends, family, and that significant other. We are all puzzles with missing pieces, the thing is, with the human puzzle not all the pieces or nearly as important as some; think about it, in any puzzle some pieces just blend in with one big blob of nothingness while some are critically important to the over all pictures. So with objects and people we hang on to the most important, the ones that impacted us the most and are critical to who we are. These are the ones who fill critical voids, critical pieces of our personal puzzle. Sometimes we as human beings aren't as superior as we think we are to the rest of the animal kingdom, sometimes we are still just animals concerned with our own well being. I'm sure this perspective is clouded to some respect, but it's out there to challenge at will.